Temptation vs. Persecution and Suffering

Here is a famous modern-Christian line I hear, and one I too am guilty of spreading for a period of time:

“GOD will not put you through anything you can’t handle – so says 1 Corinthians 10:13″

However, let us look at what the scripture really says:

“1 Cor. 10:13 – There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.”

Keyword: TEMPTATION
Modern-Christian Interpretation: SUFFERING
Correct Interpretation: TEMPTATION

Temptation has to do with SIN. Meaning, if I cannot bear a sin (i.e. Alcohol, if I was an alcoholic), then I would not be tempted above what I could not handle. Furthermore, GOD will provide an escape route.

If, however, I be persecuted or suffer for Christ’s sake (i.e. betrayed by a loved one), this is something we go through because the world hates Jesus. This kind of event has nothing to do with temptation and sin. It is simply a matter of suffering for no good reason. And although it is simple to understand, make no mistake, it is difficult to endure it – for when these things happen, we are specifically instructed by Christ to do one thing:

“Luke 6:27 – But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you”

And so you see, there is no temptation in this. So what does this mean? Will we then SUFFER above what we cannot handle?

YES.

Do NOT be surprised, if you should suffer an incredible evil done against you, even an evil so vile, that you CANNOT bear it. Even Paul the Apostle suffered so great an evil, that even he admits he CANNOT bear it:

2 Corinthians 1:8 – “For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, insomuch that we despaired even of life”

This scripture, could not describe better how my heart feels today. In 2012, when I made the leap to become a missionary for the Lord at Japan, a great evil was indeed done against me, insomuch that I have despaired of life, even a year later. It is….too much for me to bear. I don’t know if the Lord can heal me from this one. In the 10 years I have been a child of the Lord Jesus, I have never ever endured such great pain in my heart. At times, I did think of suicide, I thought about revenge, I thought about all sorts of bad things. But, in the end…all I find is LOVE. It is a very strange thing to try and explain, but in the end, I feel an overwhelming LOVE for those enemies. It is…so strange. I would probably snap if I saw them face-to-face right now, but I know now, that I would not take vengence. It is not out of some self-righteous deception that “GOD will avenge me”, that I believe. No, as a matter of fact there is a HIGH chance that they will probably be forgiven for what they did, and never ever be punished for what they did to me. There is a HIGH chance that I will never be avenged, considering they could become saved children of GOD in the future, then all would be forgiven.

I struggle with this. My heart, wants justice. My heart refuses to walk forward in the Lord until it has vengence. But, at the same time, this same heart loves them so much. The biggest paradox I ever did see. These people literally tried to kill me (I mean this physically), and yet…my heart loves them. It wants justice, but it loves them. It wants revenge, but refuses to take vengence. I have physical scars all over my body from my would-be killers, and yet…the LOVE of the LORD is stronger. It is not my mind that loves them, it is my HEART. My heart cries every night, wishing to reconcile with these traitors — wishing this betrayal would never had happened. But, the truth is there. I didn’t understand why I have been able to survive all these 10 long years without taking revenge, until I read a scripture that perfectly explains what is happening in my heart:

2 Corinthians 1:
9 But we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God which raiseth the dead:

10 Who delivered us from so great a death, and doth deliver: in whom we trust that he will yet deliver us;

When my traitors sent me into the hospital, I was paralyzed from head-to-toe, laying on my death bed, without anyone by my side. As I lay there, I cried, and BEGGED the Lord to take my life. I BEGGED HIM. I remember clearly as if it was yesterday, that I begged him to please take my life, because the pain was too great, and my body was dying anyway.

But He raised me from the dead. And when He did that, the presence of the LORD was in me. Not just with me, but IN ME. I guess the best way to describe it, is that, when this happens, you automatically LOVE everyone on the entire planet at the MAXIMUM level, even your worst enemies! Best way I could describe that “feeling”, if it was a physical feeling. I felt so….clean. I felt so….free.

I was immediately healed when He visited me in that hospital in 2004. I walked out of the hospital in perfect shape 2 days later from being totally paralyzed and sick from radiation poisoning.

In 2012, I decided to face some of these people, in an attempt to reconcile. I know— stupid. So stupid. It’s just, what happened was SO UNBELIEVABLE, that I just had to find out first-hand…did they really intend to kill me? I thought, nah…it can’t be. There must’ve been some mistake….some kind of REASON. After all, these people claim to be Christians…

But I was wrong.

Yes, they fully intended to harm me and kill me. Nothing had changed. All these years….nothing had changed, as a matter of fact it was worse. After approaching them and learning the truth, my initial reaction was anger towards GOD. I felt, that He had delivered me into the hands of my enemies. They were so … happy without me, and I felt that He had blessed them, and cursed me! I felt so betrayed by GOD. I knew that this was not right. In my mind and spirit, I knew the truth was that this was the work of the devil, trying to kill me all over again.

But my heart…….was crushed.

Totally crushed. Totally anhialated. I could not breathe. I did not eat a single morsel for 9 days. I did not speak, I did not stand. I felt the sickness coming back all over again. And this time, the Lord did not visit me. No visit, no dream, no vision, no direct words. And so, I was left a choice. Would I avenge myself? Or would I run the risk of the Lord actually forgiving these people, and living with shame all the days of my life?

Neither is true. It seems….there was an even greater answer. A difficult one. Not one out of reason, but one out of heart:

To love my enemies.

So simple, yet so difficult. Well Jesus, that is better said than done! To forgive this level of evil….is impossible. But with GOD, all things are possible. I was on my way back to death again after 2012, but GOD did again raise me from the dead. Even though there was no words, and no vision — no supernatural event — there was POWER. And that POWER, was the same POWER that was revealed to me in 2004 — LOVE. Unimaginable LOVE for the entire planet, even for those traitors. Aside from all the pain, still — all I find is LOVE. This is not possible! But after searching the scriptures, I find that the reason I feel this way in my heart, is because of the Holy Spirit. And if He still loves them, then that’s good enough for me.

Therefore, I BEG the LORD EVERY DAY, to increase the capacity for LOVE in my heart. To INCREASE IT TEN FOLD! To FILL IT. To grant me more LOVE from HIM, so that I can not only have enough LOVE for my friends and family, but also for my ENEMIES, and even have some to spare! I am not there yet, but I want to be there. I want to bathe in His LOVE, and that is the true answer — and the devil loses again. In this, is no shame. In this, my dignity is restored. In this — there is HOPE.

Z

Romans 8:36 – As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter.

Day 28

SIGNIFICANT PROGRESS!

It’s a little hard to believe since, for years, I have been trying to slim down, but it wasn’t working (because I was doing it wrong). Here’s my stats up to date:

187 lbs.
19% Body Fat

I’m still in size 34 waist, but, it seems that won’t even be small enough at the end of the month. I haven’t lost a TON of weight since I started P90X, but my body has changed a lot. Ima keep it up till the 90 days are up, and even beyond that!

My thyroid issues seem to be okay. I have been on 150 MCG since Day Zero, and I seem to be okay. Not gaining weight, no feeling sluggish. I have plenty of energy!

“Christian” Dating

I saw an interesting article today: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/life/relationships/how-should-christians-date

And now for the exposure of the feminism, and true meaning behind this article. At the end of the article, the author writes:

“…none of those other guys or gals you’ve casually dated will matter…”

Perhaps this is true, but what about them? If we follow the advice of the Modern-Christian, and partake in this serial monogamy, how much damage are we doing on the other side by gaining this “experience”, and leveling up until our flesh, oh wait, I mean — ‘heart’ decides that we have found ‘the one’?

Dalrock has an interesting post on “serial monogamy” – http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2012/08/20/womens-sacred-path-to-marriage/

“Well, Z, if Christian Dating is bad, then what do we do?”

Well, I never said it was BAD, but it is certainly similar to the world’s version of dating. Maybe even a mirror image of it, with a few verses thrown into it to make it look “Christ-like”. But, in either case, it usually has the same results. One person lives happily ever after, and the other is left for dead. Of course, this doesn’t apply to the 1-time date, where NOTHING happened between them at all . . . but we know that this is not the real case here. Someone, is going to get hurt in this process.

As I have not returned to the “dating scene” just yet (I’m enjoying my single life for a little longer), I do have an idea that is so old-fashioned, and so simple — IT MIGHT JUST WORK. I guess we’ll find out, but it’s worth a shot — and nobody gets hurt in this process.

It’s called “being friends”.

What? You mean, you just want to be “friends”? YES! This means, when you meet a woman/man, become a friend. And in case you didn’t know, here’s a few facts about friends:

1) My friends don’t hit on me. That means no advanced touching, caressing, or eye-gazing with pearly whites for hours.

2) My friends don’t hurt me. And even if they do, intentional or not, they apologize eventually — and the friendship CONTINUES. <– KEY = FORGIVENESS

3) My friends wish the BEST for me, always! That means, even marriage, be it them or not!

4) My friends would chase me down if I went missing – and slap the hell outta me for doing it.

Is this making sense ya’ll? I hope so! Now, comes the ever dreadful “friend zone”. Look gents, this is a MYTH. A myth designed to instill fear in your hearts. And when fear is in a man’s heart, a woman can smell it a mile away. So don’t fear! Trust in GOD always. I recommend to be friends for some time, at least until you fight once — cause everyone fights But not everyone forgives.

But what about “A, B, C, D, E….” about this person? I don’t like A, but I like B? ANd what about , and umm, gosh!!

Just stop it already. You will never truly know a person 100%, even if you were married for 100+ years! At some point, you must take a chance. At some point, you must take a leap of FAITH. If you have been friends for some time, then take the girl out for a nice time, ONE ON ONE, and sometime during the night, simply express your feelings. It’s probably not a good idea to ask for marriage (although I suppose it works for some!), but, just tell her how you feel about her. Tell her how precious she is to you, and that you would like to start dating! There’s nothing more fun than dating your best friend (so I hear from many wise married couples).

But in this case, you KNOW EACH OTHER. In this case, you WANT THE BEST FOR EACH OTHER, and so both parties automatically know, that neither of them intends to harm the other.

What a much better deal? And hey, don’t forget the physical boundaries. Keep in mind, that before the marriage happens, this person is potentially SOMEONE ELSES SPOUSE. So don’t do harm to another’s spouse — both sides will get hurt if you don’t end up in marriage.

This method is far less risky. What if you don’t have friends though? Well, it’s time to go make some. Go into community! You were not designed to be alone in this world, you were built for community (quote: David McDaniel)! So get that straightened out first. The rest will work out! Really!

I asked a wise man once, “how come it’s so hard to find a spouse these days, compared to the old times?” He replied:

“Z, the modern world today is nothing compared to how things were in the past. Today, people travel and chase careers, from the time they are born! It’s becoming very common to move between schools as a child, between houses and communities, start all over, and that cycle unfortunately continues into adult-hood. This was not so in the old days. Back then, people didn’t travel often, if at all. You stayed in the same community your whole life, and in those cases, men and women KNEW their spouse from childhood. They grew up together! They also group up in the same communities, which shared the same values. They didn’t need to date as people do today, in order to find out if that person is “crazy” or not. No, you already knew because you grew up together. Today, if you date someone, you have NO IDEA what kind person that is! Even if they are Christian, there is still no guarantee that the person is not a psychopath. It could take years to really know for sure.”

I took his words to heart, pondered on them to this day (years later), and decided I will no longer date as the world dates! The next time I go on a date, will be with a woman that is one of my closest friends. A woman who knows me, and I would know her. Period. Exclamation point!

Soon, I will be living in Japan for many years. It is only then, that I will re-open my heart, and carefully consider dating. It aint gonna happen off the plane, haha! But, in DUE TIME. I have a feeling my future wife is in Japan. It doesn’t necessarily mean she is going to be Japanese, but I just have this gut-feeling. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see, and continue to be patient!

How to Escape Death

Kinda the main purpose of this blog, right? Well, the short answer? GET SAVED! The best source to go to is the Bible. Here’s my collection of salvation scriptures you can lookup, and a brief tutorial that will SAVE YOUR SOUL.

http://99dmg.wordpress.com/get-saved/

Day 21

There has been significant progress. Not so much on the “weight loss”, but certainly on the “weight CHANGE.” I am down to only 188 lbs., but I feel like I’m getting smaller and smaller. Even size 34 isn’t going to cut it anymore at this rate. My mid-section has definitely, how should I say this…, DISAPPEARED. Feels nice not to have a belly anymore, haha.

I am still burning about 1,000 to 1,500 calories a day. Most of you might be thinking, with my stats and burning rate, you’d probably put me at about 2500-3000 calorie intake/day, right?

No! Something very strange is happening to me, and I think it is probably because of my “no thyroid” issue.

FYI – I don’t have a thyroid. It was removed in April 2004 because of Graves’ Disease. I was 118 lbs. then, and 2 months later, I was 210 lbs.!! Needless to say, it was the most depressing time of my life. But more on that on another blog

Because of that, my metabolism is almost non-existent, even with replacement thyroid medication. I have learned that my nutrition stats are:

Daily Maintenance Calories Intake = 1800 calories (this is what I need to ‘maintain’ my weight)
Calorie Deficit of 20% = 1440 calories (this is what I need to ‘cap out’ at in order to lose weight at a healthy rate)

This seems to be working extremely well for me. I feel great, I never feel hungry, I have energy for workouts, yada yada yada. I think this is not normal for most people, but because my metabolism is working SO SLOW, I suppose it makes sense. My thyroid levels are not low, they are normal according to my last checking a couple weeks ago. When I eat a proper meal (breakfast, lunch, dinner), I find that those meals are averaging 400 calories. At that point, I simply CANNOT eat anymore. I feel full! On top of that, I don’t feel really that hungry until about 4-5 hours later.

So this thyroid issue is really throwing my calorie balance out of whack, but since I feel great, and the doctor says everything is okay, and I’m losing weight at the recommended rate….I guess everything is fine! I will continue like this and see where it lands me.

Why 99dmg?

Have you ever played a video game, where your character has 100 HP (hit points / or health points)? You go around all the levels, and sometimes you come across that big boss and it’s super crazy to beat, and you get hit with 99dmg! Then, you’re left with 1hp, and a desperate situation. . .what will you do? Some tend to give up, and just let the enemy finish them off. But some of us…will miraculously find some kind of strength or skill to defeat the enemy at the very last second, and claim victory!

This is the truth of the lives of many Christians today. If you feel this way, that sometimes you only have 1hp left, then you’ve come to the 2nd best place (the 1st being Jesus). Know this, that you are not alone my brother/sister. There are many of us who suffer in this way, not because of sin, not because of wrongdoing, for fault, or any other reason that the “modern Christian” would have you believe. My brethren, this is all happening because the world hated Jesus FIRST, before it hated us. But, rejoice! That your name is written in heaven. That our savior is coming, and that we will live forever with Him in His Kingdom. He truly has plans for peace, and not of evil. Do not give in!

Day 10

For the first time, since April 2004, I am able to fit in size 34-waist jeans! Haha! YES! Victory!

I am down to only 190 lbs., but I have had significant body changes. I feel smaller, and my clothes are suddenly…huge. I had to buy new clothes today! I can’t tell you how good it feels to trim down so much. I think it is probably because my body has gotten rid of all the “junk in the belly”, haha.

The exercises were getting pretty easy, so I added a run/jog to my exercise routing, about once every 2-3 days seems to be good.

Day Zero

I have all the P90X equipment, motivation, determination, and most importantly, I have the LORD to back me up! It’s time to say goodbye to my excess body fat, and start taking care of my body the RIGHT way this time. Here are my starting stats:

Age: 29

*Thyroid: NONE, I don’t have one. I have to take 150 MCG Levothyroxine (Generic)/day for replacement. I used to be at 175 MCG till today. I dropped the dosage because of all the heart pain I was getting.
*Therefore, my metabolism SUCKS because it is dependent on my medication. Ain’t a thing I can do about it, but I CAN do something about my diet and exercise…

Height: 5 ft. 6 in.

Weight: 194 lbs.

Body Fat % = 23.75%

Goal by Day 90 = 160 lbs.

Resting Heart Rate: 68 bpm

Max Pull-Ups: 0

Max Push-Ups: 32

Toe-Touch: -5 in.

Wall Squat: 47 sec.

In&Outs: 31

Prior Eating Habits: BAD: I would eat lots of crackers, everyday, which would amount to about 3,000-6,000mg/day. LOTS of Carbohydrates in my diet (High-Glycemic), and hardly any protein. Lots of pizza, lots of soda.

I am absolutely dedicated to finish P90X, get my diet under control, and over-time, watch my weight and body fat get under control. At this point in time, i feel a lot of chest pains and heart issues. Sometimes it feels like that thing is going to explode! Well, wish me luck friends, and send up a prayer too if you could. I’m going to need His help to get through this, that’s for sure. I believe it is within reach! I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. For when I am weak, then, I am strong!